Thursday, June 28, 2012


 OUR HEARTS TOWARD GOD

        Forgive me if I shared this with you back in 2004 via email.  I didn’t know what to do with anything I wrote then and probably have nothing left from that time.  I was moving things around the other day and came across this.  Somehow it made it through the move by being under stuff and as I finished reading I found it still spoke to me. 

Logan spent the summer with his grandparents so his mom would not have to pay childcare.  She came in each weekend to be with him.  Since his grandparents raised girls; the summer was an eye-opening experience.  He was leaving the baby stage and, was entering the boy-man stage of life.  He had begun to get nasty, smell nasty; and leave everything nasty.

He was Pop’s Partner and Nana’s Sweet Pea (when no was near to hear).  Pop taught him to burn ants with a magnifying glass; do yard work and work hard; to be a gentleman and watch out for your women.  He also learned to rig a fishing line; how to safely handle his hunting rifle; and a million other things.  Pop and Log enjoyed riding on Pop’s motorcycle and swimming together and watching Fear Factor.  Nana hated Fear Factor!

Nana taught him how to swim under water and made sure he got swimming lessons.  She fed him every 2-3 hours when he said he was starving.

They went to VBS together, shopped together and popped fireworks together.  Nana made sure he had household chores and when he tried to sneak through the house to scare her she turned the tables on him.  Most importantly, Nana and Pop talked about God a lot and made sure he went to church.

Night times were special to Nana as she prayed over him and she got her Nana sugar and he got his Logan sugar.

One weekend when he was going home with his mom, and Pop had to work; Nana sarcastically made the remark that she would try not to cry.  Logan whispered in Pop’s ear that it would be all right because God would be with her.

Logan almost never stopped talking, eating, or moving; so Nana learned a survival tip early in the summer.  Every afternoon after lunch she set a timer and Logan would go to his room and watch a video, read, play, or lie down.  The time was his unless she noticed he really needed to res.  In that case, he was to lie down and watch a video.

I was on one of these occasions that she was standing in the doorway of his room setting the timer and chitchatting with him that he called her name.

“Nana?”

She turned and looked at him as she was putting the timer on the bookcase.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too”, she replied.  “Rest well, ok?”

As she closed the door, she felt a surge of emotion as she realized the impact of the conversation.  She and Pop had always initiated the “I love you”; and he had always responded with “I love you, too.”  This time he had initiated the interaction.

 Nana had seen his body language, heard the tone of his voice, and had seen the look in his eyes.  At that moment, they both realized how much he loved her.  It wasn’t about receiving anything from her or talking to her.  It was about how he felt toward her.

Later she realized she might have tasted what the Father feels when His children respond from their hearts.  Not just because they should thank Him or love Him or because it is expected.  It is simply because of who He is and because they know His heart. 

Late in the night she heard her Pastor say what he had said many times nearing the end of church praise and worship time.

“Open your mouth and tell Him how much you love Him.  There are a million voices out there; but He is longing to hear your voice.”

He is longing to see your body language, see the look in your eyes, hear the tone of your voice and when you call out His name He will stop and turn and look at you.  At that very moment you will both know how much you love Him.



B.D.

August 7, 2004



It is hard to believe Logan is now a teenager.  My heart still melts at the sound of his name or any of my grandchildren’s names.  I want my heart to melt at the sound of my Daddy God as it does with my grandchildren.  I hope you will join me in seeking His face and more than you seek what is in His hand.

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Ressurrection Sunday!

I have a couple of soap boxes I climb on a couple times during the year, one being Easter and the other is Christmas.  Now, stop rolling your eyes until I'm finished.  I happen to love both holidays; but, I have evolved during the past few years to trying to understand the attitude of why people get upset over holiday traditions.

Start with Easter and I will save Christmas for later.  On one hand you have those who holler it is/was a pagan holiday.  True, I just don't know if it is or was.  Another group gets upset because they say it is a Christian holiday and we shouldn't do the chocolate bunnies, Easter egg hunts, etc.  Others think we should only observe Passover.  Then there are those representing all of the above!

While I was reading the account of what many call the holy week this morning I had several thoughts I would like to share with you.

We were not asked to observe the resurrection of Christ.  It is/was a pagan holiday that we put a Christianity spin; but that is OK as long He gets glorified.  Jesus used objects and parables to get his point across all the while glorifying the Father.  We were only told to observe communion and baptism.  It is time we quit getting upset with each other.  We are family.  Jesus, by example, washes the disciples' feet telling them they ought to do the same. John 13:14   Let us humble ourselves in the way we speak of our brothers and sisters.    "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another as I have loved you, that you also love one another.  By this, all will know that your are My disciples, if you have love for one another." John 13-34-35  ALL WILL KNOW.  Hmmm.  We have never gotten this down in our hearts, have we?  I think not.

The world sees us bickering over this holiday all the while making money while we shop with them.  Most people, even if they don't recognize Easter, will have a family dinner probably with ham and all the trimmings.  I find it amusing that God tells the Jewish people not to eat pork and almost everyone will have ham for Easter dinner. Now I'm wondering if I can get a friend of mine to bake  me one of her fabulous hams.  Sorry, rabbit trail.  No pun intended.   Seriously, does it really matter if we dye eggs and hide them for our kids and grand kids to find? (dye the eggs to eat but hide plastic!)   Does it really hurt for them to receive chocolate bunnies or eggs?  I always told my kids that it had nothing to do with why we celebrated Easter.  It was a game we can do anytime of the year. Personally, it is easier this time of the year because I can buy those little dye tables this time of the year.

If you think by not celebrating Easter sends a message to the world, it doesn't.  It shows them we can't agree on anything.  Nor is it going to change your brothers or sisters minds.  Why don't we show the world we love one another instead?  Understand me loud and clear, I'm in full agreement we need to correct one another in love when one is straying or breaking a commandment.  This disagreeing over participating in Easter is not breaking any commands or expectations God has given.  Do you really know someone who is worshipping a chocolate bunny or any of the pagan idols?  Loosen up that was a funny.  :)

Then there are those who only have Passover celebration which I think is a cool idea.  If you are recognizing that Christ is the Passover lamb.  (ICor. 5:7)  No need to slaughter the lamb without blemish that never took away sins but covered them.  Unless you want leg of lamb for Easter dinner!  Jesus Christ, the sacrificial lamb, took our sins into his own body; so we can experience the joys of His resurrection!

In Matthew 26 we find Jesus celebrating Passover with his disciples and while He is celebrating He institutes the Lord's supper.  Maybe it is more important we have communion with Him as a way to celebrate Easter than anything else we do.  We are to do this in remembrance of Him.  Remembering what He did on the cross and that He was resurrected by our Father.  Resurrection power!

Speaking of resurrection power, I enjoyed Matthew 28 this week.  HE IS RISEN!  I love reading the reactions of those who were grieving and fearful then we find them rejoicing.  Would you like to know my favorite verse this Easter?  Matthew 28:9:  'and as they went to tell His disciples, behold, Jesus met them, saying, "Rejoice!"  So they came and held Him by the feet and worshiped Him.'  Wow. Rejoice.  Rejoice He wasn't left in the tomb, rejoice your sins are forgiven, and rejoice He has given eternal life!  Rejoice the veil in the temple was split from the top to the bottom so you can fall at His feet and worship!  There are so many promises we have been given that we could rejoice until He calls us home!  The resurrection is meant to be celebrated every day of our lives and you can take that to the bank.

I know this a departure of what I normally blog but it has been on my heart all week.  I've already dyed eggs with two of our grandchildren.  I have to get the other one over here to dye eggs.  I will be buying chocolate bunnies/eggs for all of them.  I won't be having ham this Sunday because I'm sure my friend isn't going to bake one for me.  She knows who she is. :)  I just hope you will relax and enjoy all the trimmings of Easter.  Only be sure to rejoice and worship and spend some time remembering Him by partaking with the Lord's Supper.  While you are doing all this, also take time to show love to your brother and sister in Christ.  Show some love to someone who is trying to fill their lives with anything but Him.  After, all, a chocolate bunny will come close to filling, but we know it isn't lasting. 

Again, I say, Rejoice!
   



Thursday, March 15, 2012

Offended

OFFENDED

After many shared at bible study and as we talked among ourselves in different small groups before leaving, I felt the need to re post this but with some revisions or new thoughts I feel God gave me.  After all, I’m wide awake at three am with these thoughts running through my head knowing if I don’t get them down they will disappear by the time the sun is up.  Anyone who knows me at all knows they are from God because I am don’t like to function at this time.  J
It seems the opportunity to be offended or hurt is always being offered up on a silver platter for us to partake of.  Satan will never miss an opportunity to use flesh and blood to hurt us.  I think God understands the hurt considering how Jesus was betrayed and the offenses he endured.   I often like to say, “This is experience talking.”  Over the course of time, if you read anything I write or talk with me you will hear the expression along with ‘life isn’t fair’.   I said life isn’t fair so many times when my kids were growing up that before I could get the word ‘life’ out of my mouth they would finish the sentence being careful not to let me see them rolling the eyes.
Let me say first, I am thankful for word document when writing because it corrects my grammar and spelling.  It perplexed me when it kept telling me the word unforgiveness was misspelled (there it goes again) and it didn’t have a spelling for it.  I kept thinking, “But I hear it all the time?  How can it not be in the dictionary?”  I’m not the sharpest pencil in the box when it comes to grammar but my spelling isn’t bad.  I remembered from my English class that ‘un’ meant ‘not’ so unforgiveness would mean not to forgive.  Right?  This is why I’m up at three am looking in a dictionary.  The Webster’s New World Dictionary does not give a definition for the word unforgiveness .  It doesn’t exist.  It does give a definition for the prefix ‘un’ but let me tell you what it says at the end of that definition. “The list at the bottom of the following pages includes many of the compounds formed with un- (either prefix) that do not have special meanings”.  Seventeen pages of compound words, if I counted correctly.  Along with the word unforgiveness it list unforgivable, unforgivably, unforgiven (and word document refuses to recognize the word unforgiven, also).
I may have bored you with an English lesson but it occurred to me that if the dictionary and word document does not recognize the word or it does not have a special meaning then we shouldn’t recognize it either.  Would it not be great not to have the emotion of an unforgivable spirit?  Jesus tried to tell us when he told Peter to forgive 70 times 7.  (Matthew 18:21 How often should we forgive someone who continues to hurt us?)   I’d like to carry the 70 times 7 in a little different direction.  What if the person hasn’t sinned, offended, or hurt you often?  What if it is just one time?  One horrible, devastating time and you have to face God wondering why He allowed it to happen.  (Are you feeling Job’s pain, yet?)    What if you have to forgive seventy times seven because it keeps coming up that many times in your thoughts?  Not because the person has offended that many times but because Satan keeps bringing it to remembrance that many times.  We assist him by not recognizing we are not fighting flesh and blood so we sit down on the thought and dwell.  We struggle with an unforgivable spirit knowing full well we are to forgive but are dwelling on the hurt, the whys, the anger. 
How about forgiving you?  Seventy times seven the guilt enters your mind. Day after day and sometimes moment by moment the guilt takes up residency.   My daddy, who worked on death row as a lay chaplain, often said new believers on death row struggled with this.  They believed they were forgiven by God but struggled with forgiving themselves. I think many felt it wasn’t fair to the victim’s families who were still suffering for what they had done.  Many gave up their appeals in hopes of giving the families some closure.  Maybe in the comment box below you can give some insight how you do it.  It is one of the hardest things I’ve found to do.  I know when I don’t let my Daddy’s love wash over me and forgive myself I’m giving Satan a victory in my life.  I am giving him a foothold that will hold me back from fulfilling my purpose here on earth and stealing my peace and joy.  It is like slapping my Daddy in the face saying Jesus’ death on the cross wasn’t enough. 
Ever shook a spiritual fist at God?  I have and what I found out it is a trust issue I have with God.  Plain and simple trust issue when I question why he would allow something to happen.  I distinctly remember questioning him once and he reminded me by asking who the potter was and who the clay was.  John 6:60-71 finds Jesus asking the multitude of disciples if they are offended by his words and when many left he asked the twelve if they wanted to go.  Sometimes his words are ‘hard sayings’ but like Peter I have to say, “Lord, to whom shall we go?  You have the words of eternal life.” (v.68)   
The trust issue is with God and not with who has offended or hurt me.  It is something I have to continue to remind myself over and over since the opportunity is always presenting itself and always will. 
Below is something I wrote in 2011 and it bears repeating.  By the way, as Ronnie can testify there is a streak of stubbornness in me so I’ve decided not to take the word unforgiveness out. I suspect this subject will appear with revisions again. J


UNFORGIVENESS
I have been giving serious consideration to doing a 21 day fast in January for physical and spiritual purposes. Believe it or not I have so enjoyed the results in the past of things God spoke to me and how I slept and felt so much better.
As I sat this morning reading devotionals and the Word, I thought of one way to feel lighter that so many people never experience. It is forgiveness. So many refuse to give forgiveness because it is the one thing we feel we can control. Many times it isn't a conscious thought; but it is what we do. Only unforgiveness controls us not the other way around. In fact, when we have unforgiveness in our lives, nothing is going right. It hurts us physically, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally and it hurts those we love. It hurts while they stand helpless to help while watching us hang on to the unforgiveness. Let's face it how great is it to be around someone who is grumpy, angry, unhappy, resentful and depressed.
If the sight of someone or the thought of someone or some situation causes all kinds of negative emotions, then there is unforgiveness inside of us. We have to let God heal the pain.
The truth is God established forgiveness for us not for the party who injured us and it is to be unlimited forgiveness. In the book of Matthew, Jesus tells Peter he must forgive his brother seventy times seven. Continuous, overflowing, and forever. Do they deserve it? Absolutely not! Should they pay for their actions? Absolutely! Do they deserve what is coming to them? Absolutely! Yet, I am absolutely thankful that God doesn't give to me what I deserve! He only gives me forgiveness and mercy.
One year I was walking up the back steps of my house and anger rose up in me over a situation. I stopped and stomped my foot and said out loud, "I do not want this anger and I refuse it. Devil you are not going to have my life." The anger left and lightness came. Something you might try is what I did when I grew up and God was growing me up. I wrote down all the people who had harm me or people that it hurt me to think about. I then carried my list to the kitchen sink and burned it never to look back again. There is nothing spiritual in doing this but it is a memorial of forgiveness.
If you want to feel lighter and in control and looking forward to 2011, then let go of unforgiveness. Make it a deliberate act and a goal for this New Year; then you can meet people and God with a joyful Happy New Year and mean it!
I can say I have been able to go into many a new year with a light heart because I chose to forgive. It is my prayer you will be able to say the same for the rest of your life.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

The Honeycomb

            Our pastor mentioned Proverbs 27:7 Thursday morning before we began to pray. “A satisfied soul loathes the honeycomb, but to a hungry soul every bitter thing is sweet.”
His point: if we stay full of things that distract then we will not desire the Word of God or the things of God.  In fact, he said if we eat junk we will loathe the steak.  This proverb became a reality this week in my life.
            Prayer began at six am afterwards Ronnie and I ate breakfast at a local restaurant.   By the time we got home I enjoyed a two our nap before we drove to Camden to a gun and pawn shop.  While we were in Camden we decided to try a new place for lunch.   I only had a biscuit, bacon, and egg sandwich for breakfast but; I was still satisfied so I didn’t finish my lunch.  On our way back we decided he needed to go back into Magnolia to run a couple more errands.  I suggested before we left Magnolia that we share a small chocolate milkshake which translates: “I want a couple swallows and you can have the rest.”  While he was ordering my mind had wandered to other things when I realized he had order two milkshakes instead of one.  Of course, you know I drank the whole thing.  By six thirty that night I still wasn’t hungry even though he said we had to grill the steaks he had marinated.  The very thought of eating again was loathsome to me.  I couldn’t believe our Pastor had just talked about loathing a steak and here I was staring at one that I loathed.  We split a steak and a bake potato; but, in truth, I could have done without food until the next day.  The next morning I used the other steak and scrambled eggs and had biscuits for breakfast.  Breakfast!  My favorite meal of the day!  The steak was the best ever.  Why?   Because I was hungry.
            It is also so true in the spiritual realm. Let me make a confession.  There have been times in my life that I have loathed the Word of God, prayer, and/or church.  Anything spiritual.  There it is.  Out in the open.  Please don’t tell me I’m the only one.  I won’t believe you!  It will happen when I’ve stayed away from the things of God.  I’m not talking open rebellion.  I’m not talking when life throws a curve ball of an emergency or more than one emergency at a time.  A curve ball will send me to my knees to the only One who can help me.  I’m talking about when life distracts me.  When I’ve run and run or people have demanded my attention for a long period of time.  When I am on someone else’s timetable.  Those times when I fall into bed at night and drag myself out the next day to do it all over again.  Or the times it is my fault.  I’ve gotten up running to finish my ’to do’ list.   I’m nothing if I’m not a ’to do’ list maker.  I’m also guilty of reading, playing computer card games, watching movies, or Facebooking too much.  Do I have a witness?  Then one morning I will wake up realizing that although I pretty well know the Word, I haven’t spent anytime with the Word made flesh.   The Holy Spirit seems to be elsewhere.   I am dried up internally and hungry.  These are the times I loathe getting back into the Word, dread facing prayer because I’ve been too busy doing other things.  Even good things.  These are the times I loathe the honeycomb.  These are the times I have to get on my knees spiritually and most of the time physically, as well, admitting how much I have missed my Daddy God.  Then all is right in my world.
       I will make another confession.  It doesn’t happen as often as it used to because I have come to love the Honeycomb more than anything else.  Psalms 19 speaks how perfect, sure, right, pure, true and righteous are the commandments, statues, and judgments of the Lord.  More to be desired are they than gold; Sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb. “v. 10    I will often do small fasts which usually start out as physical cleansing but end in a spiritual fast.  Fasts are never easy in the beginning.  I have to start slow and I admit I fail at them more times than I care to confess.   Oh, but the sweet time I’ve had when I’m able to discerned the voice of God and his leading in something specific.  No guilt trip here.  I fast when I need a specific answer but if we are always distracted we miss his voice.

            A gentle whisper, a still small voice, a delicate whispering voice are some translations.  How are we going to hear Him if we are listening to the entire racket in our lives?
            When we lived in the home where we raised our girls my kitchen faced the street.  Many times daughter #2 would walk in the kitchen and say, “Daddy’s home.”  I would turn to look out in time to see Ronnie’s truck rolling in front of the house.  He drove a stick shift and would put it in neutral as he approached the house rolling to a stop.   I would decide I was going to listen for him the next day but I always became distracted by preparing dinner or by the noise in the house.  I never heard him coming. Ever. She always did.  She was listening for her daddy and was not distracted by other things.  She knew when and where he would be coming home.  Oh, that our ears would be that in tuned to our Daddy God!
            One thing I noticed about the verse above is we have to STAND and wait for the noise to subside.  I describe it as internal noise.  There are times I feel as though there is a powerful wind tearing through me and shattering the very rock of my
foundation shaking me to the core.  He told Elijah to go and stand in His presence.  Ever notice how hard it is to stand in His presence when every thing around you is falling apart around you?  Elijah wasn’t exactly in the best spiritual high when God gave him this command.  He thought he was the only one left serving God.
            “I alone am left; and they seek to take my life.” v.10
And yet, God tells him to go and stand on the mountain before the Lord.  We may not always be able to control our circumstances; but, we can choose were we will stand.
            If we discipline ourselves during the quiet times in our lives to listen for Him then when everything is falling apart around us, we will be able to stand and listen.
            What are you hungry for?  What are you craving?  Are you too full of the things of this world?  I will ask you what are you willing to give up to hear that small, delicate whisper?  Is it getting up a half hour or so before everyone else?  Is it giving up a favorite TV show, Facebook, video games, music or a hobby?  Only you know what replaces your time with Him.   Maybe you need to realize what is filling your thought life.  Is it negative thinking, bitterness, envy, unforgiveness, hopelessness, frustration?  Maybe it isn’t giving up things of the world maybe it is things in your emotional realm that you need to give up.  Look into the Word of God for the answers to the emotional junk food in your life.  Then submit to the Word which became flesh then stand still and hear the small, whispering, gentle voice.  Daddy God wants to talk with you; after all you are His daughter, royalty, the apple of His eye.  Why not give it a shot and see what happens?  This Daddy’s girl would love to hear how He speaks to you, my sister.
    I can’t let you go until I ask you this.  Are you a Daddy’s girl?  Are you my sister in Christ?   He loves you so much He wants you to become a daughter of His.  Will you consider bending a knee before Him so you can sit at His feet and lean your head in His lap?  So, you can hear for yourself His telling you how much He loves you?  
If you would like to talk, email me and I will get in touch with you.
Until, next time I pray you will sit at his feet and enjoy being with your Daddy God.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Daddy's Girl

Unlike my girls or my granddaughters I missed having times with my daddy when I was little.  Those times when you wake in the morning and curl up  in bed with them or sit in the lap as they read to you.  The times when you look at your daddy and know you are the apple of his eye. My time was two weeks in the summer and alternative holidays. The one gift he gave me that no one could take away was I was the first person he led to know the salvation of God.  He often said he was shaking and stuttering when he led me in prayer.  Then around twelve or so distance in miles and distance in the hearts separated.

God in all His goodness brought us back together when I was pregnant with my first child.  There seemed to be a void or longing to talk to him again. So strong was the void that I wrote him a letter letting him know he was going to be a Papaw.  Chalk it up to hormones but I will chalk it up to the Spirit of God moving in my life rather I recognized it or not.

And so, began our journey together began. Two people reaching out who knew too little of what made the other tick and too little of  our Abba Father.  We began to open the can of worms by talking things out, confessing, and forgiving all the while growing closer to our Abba Father. When daughter #2 was enjoying her wedding reception and everything was in full  swing; I had him go back into the church and gave him the gift of walking me down the aisle.  Something he didn't get to do when I got married.  A remark our pastor said that day stuck in my memory.  "God is a God of second, third, fourth chances." 

My daddy ran ahead of me spiritually so close was he to His Abba Father. So close that he ran right into His arms and once again left me in 2010.  This is not a journey of tears but of victory for both of us.  His is completed and mine is ongoing every day.

My Abba Daddy has always been patient with me rather I was in full swing rebellion or walking close with Him.  He has allowed me to open cans of worms, listening to my confessions, forgiving me, and loving me.  Little by little He has walked the painstakingly path of faith until I could fully trust Him with my heart and because of that I can honestly say, "I am a Daddy's girl".

I started this blog because within twenty-four hours two people unknowing of the other told me I should share the things I write with other people.  I told one that I would pray but had my doubts. On our way home last night in the darkness I began to think on the conversation I had with one when I began to feel the tangible presence of God.  I quietly asked if He was giving me the go ahead and in the recesses of my mind He brought back a memory.

Years ago I attended church with my daddy and his pastor said something that struck a chord within me.  Later that afternoon I started writing and daddy asked to read what I was writing.  After reading it he said, "You should share your heart with people when you write.  You have a gift".  Then the words came,"Daddy's Girl".

Maybe you have always been a daddy's girl or maybe not.  I don't know where you stand in your own journey but I hope you can glean from the things He has given me.  Oh, and the title, In the Beginning. Well, this is the beginning of His creation. 

Come and enjoy this journey with me. After all, you can never be to old to be a Daddy's girl.